"I am proactively healing my body. I am creating a healthy body. My weight is normalizing. I now release all blocks that prevent me from having and maintaining a healthy body, and I am restored to balance."-Bella Florence January 30, 2019: It’s 10 o’clock on a Wednesday morning, day 3 of my sophomore spring. 72... Continue Reading →
I Exploited Myself: Or Did I? "Every day is an opportunity" --B___ A_____. On Tuesday, November 27, 2018 (8 days ago now as I write this), I participated in my college's annual Mental Health Arts Festival. (I say annual, but it's only the second year.) I did so last year as well, debuting "Self VS... Continue Reading →
I wrote in a recent essay that recovering from my eating disorder is my greatest accomplishment, and my higher self believes that. But my other self, my darker self, sees the opposite as true. It sees my greatest accomplishment as my eating disorder itself. I’ll never forget the moment—I must have been eleven years old—when... Continue Reading →
I should have regained my power over time, but my mindset was permanently altered. In my years of treatment I was wired to believe that I had reason to doubt myself. But this is a new experience; I am in a new space and time. I'm can receive news about my health and decide for myself what it means.
In the spirit of counting blessings, I have a story to tell. Last Tuesday, during a bout of insomnia, I called in sick to work. For the sake of context, I work at a bakery, a bubblegum-pop franchise in downtown New Orleans. Many have asked if I find it triggering to work around sweets all... Continue Reading →
Am I "less gay" because I came out "late" in adolescence? Of course not. But I feel that I'm received that way. Yesterday I was walking down the street and I decided to call a loved one. At the end of our phone call, out of the blue, they asked that I not "close the doors" on... Continue Reading →
Dear Blonde Lady with the Scale, While I think you are a very nice person who bears a freakish resemblance to Nicole Kidman, frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn what you "recommend." Let's make one thing clear: I want to be healthy. But I want to be healthy on my terms. Who are... Continue Reading →
How did I wind up with thoughts and values that aren't my own? Why do I question when people tell me I'm beautiful? When people tell me I'm worthy of love? Why do I believe that my happiness is determined by a number on a scale, or the width of my waistline? Why do I... Continue Reading →